So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
