Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Randomize
