Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
