we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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