I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm just crazy horny about you
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
