Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
