She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
