Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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