she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
