Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
