I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
is wine microwaveable?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize