so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
