Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize