I want to make a zoo with you.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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