Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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