I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
