shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Randomize
