ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Randomize
