That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
