how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize