Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
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