I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize