should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So much Jack, so little girl.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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