My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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