I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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