Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
