Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
