Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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