Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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