you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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