i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
