i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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