Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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