I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
