He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
