in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
