I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
