i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
