I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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