I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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