hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
