The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
