at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
