White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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