Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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