I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
