just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
