they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
