i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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