So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
