So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
