How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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